Mother of Seven + 2

Heartache.  Deep, painful, agonizing heartache.  For a season that felt like it would never end, I carried a weight of anguish that tore at my very soul.  Parenting had been the source of immense joy for me, but at the same time there came with it intense sorrow.    Learning to handle this heartache is something that for me personally both challenged and grew my faith.  During this time I learned to appreciate the words of Psalm 77.  The lament of the Psalmist was much the same as my own heart cry to God.  It says,  I cry aloud to God, aloud to God, and he will hear me.  In the day of my trouble I seek the Lord; in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints. You hold my eyelids open ; I am so troubled that I cannot speak. I consider the days of old, the years long ago. I said, “Let me remember my song in the night; let me meditate in...

 When I was in Bible college I was told that when God called you to ministry he would provide.  Specifically one of the things he would provide was the family we might have to leave behind.  There would be someone that would be that Mom or Grandma that we needed wherever God called us to serve.  Family has always been the hardest for me to be away from in our years of ministry.  The funny part is God didn't call us too far away, but he did take my parents to China for several years.  God helped fill the gap with the most beautiful and special lady, LaVada Smoot. We moved to Fredonia in 1997.  LaVada was the first to show up on our doorstep with her famous potato soup whenever one of us was a bit under the weather.  I soon found she was a good source of advice for anything from potty training to cooking.   She taught me how to make bread in the bread machine and how to make sand plum jelly.  I found excuses to call or go visit her, a...

I was glancing back through my journal that I am about to close and stash away with many others when I found these words that I wrote in June of 2019.  I vividly remember penning these words through tears as I tried to come to terms with my husband's plans to change ministries.  This was a very personal and lonely struggle for me.  I share now only to say there are hard changes in life sometimes, but they become opportunities for growth.  I needed to struggle in the shadow of the cross.  There were things in my life that needed fully submitted to Him.   I learned that it is in complete surrender that peace is found .  It is hard to describe that peace and why it is there.  Perhaps that is why we find these words penned by the apostle Paul in Philippians 4: 6-7, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all und...

 Dear Linda, I do not weep for you.  My tears are for the empty spot inside of me.  I rejoice for you.  You are with the One you loved more than this life.  No more pain.  No more suffering.  If you can get this message in heaven, I just want to say thank you.  Thank you for all the memories.  My heart is full of gratitude to God for the blessing of you.  Thirty-eight beautiful years I knew you, and I treasure every one. God brought you into my life when I was in 8th grade.  You taught our girl's Sunday School class at church.  We were a silly bunch of giggling middle school and high school girls.  I remember you shaking your head and laughing along with us. You would invite all of us crazy girls to your house for fun and taffy pulls.  You even braved loading us up in your car for shopping trips to Bartlesville each year.  You knew our secret crushes, our dreams, and our struggles.  We were all your girls, a...

There are several women who have been role models and teachers to me.  Esther Friend was one of those people in my life.  Titus 2:3-5 says, Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good.  Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. Esther taught me much about how to love my husband.  I remember meeting Esther when I was twelve years old.  To me she was beautiful.  She often had a smile as she cheerfully worked serving those around her.  She was in her element when she had a kitchen at her disposal with lots of people to feed.   Over the years what stood out to me about Esther was the way she worked alongside her husband.  They farmed together, raised dogs together, and drov...

An Overview of the Book of Deuteronomy It is hard to remember something when we just hear it once or even twice.    We all need reminded over and over about what is important. I believe that is what the book of Deuteronomy is all about. It is a retelling of Israel’s history, the Law, and God’s keeping of his covenant promise to them. They needed reminded of what was important. The Book of Deuteronomy - YouTube Lesson: Deuteronomy is a 2 nd telling of Israel’s history, a 2 nd telling of the law, a nd another reminder of God’s faithfulness. He is a God who keeps His Word. Read Deuteronomy 6:4-8.   What are the Israelites asked to do in 6:4?   They were asked to hear in a manner that required more then just an auditory intake of sound into the ear. This hearing was something that required action.  Listen and Do. What actions are required that you find in verses 5-8?     How were they to do this?   They were to keep the comm...

     Parenting is tough.  We have seven grown children and two still at home.  The longer I've parented, the more I realize I'm pretty much a mess.  I don't have the answers.  I can't claim all seven children as wonderful success stories.  Parenting our last two isn't easier after already raising seven.  That's probably not what you wanted to hear, but it is reality.      It is scary for me to attempt to offer advice.  The best thing I can offer is the Holy Scripture.  I love Isaiah 55:8-11 which says, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts; neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.  As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.  As the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word ...

      It has hit me hard.  Our Angel Girl is graduating from high school in just a month.  In addition, she's moving out of the nest.  I thought I was ready, but suddenly the tears are flowing. Photo Credit: Shelli Ford Photography shelliford (smugmug.com)        Sweet Girl, my first thought of you, a gift from God, came in the most unexpected way.  I could never erase that picture.  The little girl with the sad eyes...I knew I would know them if I ever saw them.  ( The Beginning )      When you stepped out of the van into my arms, I knew you were home.  You did too.  You called me "mama."  I called you mine.  ( Our Angel Girl )      You asked me to "pway to Jesus that I can tay here porever and ever."  I fell on my knees beside my bed and begged Jesus to answer your prayer.  With tears I poured my heart out on your behalf.  Jesus heard us.  ( Ambe...

Walking together, holding hands.   Laughing, talking, enjoying the idea of love.   Our simple beginning. Someone to dream with.   To start a family with.   To serve God with.   You were the answer to my prayers.   The answer to my parent's prayers.   God's gift to me, immeasurably more than I could ever ask or imagine. We've held our babies. Watched them grow. Given them to God, given them to another to love. You have wept with me and wiped my tears. You have been my rock when the world around me crumbled. You have held me tight when sorrow threatened all I knew. You have encouraged me to reach for my dreams. You made me a wife and mother. Made those without family our own.  You believe in me though you know my weaknesses. You want me to still dream, still pursue my passions. You desire for me to be all God wants me to be. I don't deserve all that you have given me. All that God has given me in you. But I'm grate...

Read James 2:1-4. What command are we given in verse 1? Define partiality or favoritism. What was happening when the Christians were gathering together? (2-4) What are some ways this same thing happens today in the church? How does showing favor to one over another make one a judge with evil thoughts or motives? (v. 4) In Luke 6:20 and Mt. 5:3 we learn that God chose the poor to be rich in faith, and also that the poor will receive the kingdom of God. Does this mean all poor will be in heaven or that there won’t be any rich in heaven? Why or why not? For further clarification... Read Mt. 19:23-26. What is easier for a camel then for a rich man? Can a rich man be saved? Read James 1:9-11. What do poor believers have to be able to take pride in? What should the rich believers boast about? Why should the rich boast only in what they have in Christ? Read James 2:5-7. Who did God honor? (v. 5) Yet who is it that these Christians were dishonoring? (v. 6) ...

A Lesson on the Tongue from James The tongue is often the tool we use to give vent to our anger. Read James 1:19-21. What are we to be quick to do? (v. 19) What are we to be slow to do? (v. 19) Why are we to be slow to become angry? (v. 20) What kinds of words are we to use when we do speak? (See Prov. 15:1) How many words should we use when we are angry or any other time? (See Prov. 10:19) “ When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, But he who restrains his lips is wise.” Proverbs 10:19 (NASB) Is anger a sin? Why or why not? (See Ephesians 4:26-27) What are some examples of righteous anger? (For a Biblical example see John 2:13-16) What are we to get rid of in our lives? (v. 21) What are we to humbly accept? (v. 21) Think about a garden. In order for the plants to grow and thrive, we have to get out the rocks, we have to pull the weeds, we have to loosen the soil, and we have to water the ground. How can we use this as a picture of our C...

HOW TO GAIN WISDOM Read James 1:5-8 What is God’s attitude in giving wisdom? (v. 5) In what manner should we go about asking for wisdom? (v. 6) Why are we told to ask for wisdom believing he will give it? (v. 6-8) What is the anchor for our souls that keeps us from being tossed like the sea? (See Hebrews 6:17-20) HOW THE WISE WALK...IN HUMILITY Read James 3:13-18. If one is wise and understanding of God’s ways, how does he live? (v. 13) Who in the Bible is described as humble and gentle? (See Matthew 11:29) Why does wisdom require humility? How does bitter envy and selfish ambition contrast with humility? (v. 14-17) What is boasting? What does boasting tend to cover up? (v. 14) Contrast earthly wisdom with heavenly wisdom. What do the attributes listed under Heavenly Wisdom remind you of? (See Gal. 5:22-23; Mt. 5:3-12) HOW LIFE LOOKS WITHOUT WISDOM Read James 4:1-3. These verses follow directly on the heals of 3:17-18...

  Do Faith and Works Go Together? “ The grace of God and the grateful response of man are both important.” Read James 1:22-25. vs. 22 – KEY VERSE IN JAMES See also Luke 11:28 How might we deceive ourselves is we only “listen” to the Word? (v. 22) Who is the person like that only hears the Word but does not do what it says? (vs. 23, 24) Thought question: How might the church today be characterized? As “hearers only” or as “hearers who do it?” How are we to look into the “perfect law?” (v. 25) “ The Word should make a lasting impression on our lives – so much so that we act on it.” How does the “perfect law” give freedom or set us free? It almost seems a contradiction. Freedom is gained by doing what the law says??? It sounds like we have to do it. How can that be tied to freedom? (See John 8:31-36) What is the positive outcome for those who “hear and do” the Word? (v. 25) Read James 2:14-26. List all your obser...