Mother of Seven + 2

Amber's favorite Bible story always has been Paul and Silas.  She loved to hear her daddy read the story because he did it with all the dramatic effects.  They would sing and pray while in prison, and the whole bed would shake during the earthquake.  Then Amber would want him to read the story again.   As I reflect back on Amber's life I realize how much she has lived this story.  She had been chained by fear for years...imprisoned in a cell with no bars.  When she was just three years old, I would wake up at night to hear her singing "Jesus Loves Me" in a quavering voice.  She would feel alone, sad, and trapped.  She sang to the one who loved her.  She had many a sleepless night, but she talked to God.  As an older child when her heart was troubled she spent hours outside on her scooter listening to Christian music and singing to God.  Singing and Praying while in prison. We experienced an earthquake last year, but it freed ...

Working in my kitchen Hearing children's voices at play Feet thumping up back steps Door thrown open Four year old palm grasping treasure Plunks it upon the counter A crushed dandelion the first this spring gazes up at me Excited words spoken hurriedly "Hey, mom, I picked this dandelion just for you." Then back out the door he dashes Only an hour later I look upon the bloom Now withered with petals curling inward And it hits me Time is fleeting Little boy today Grown tomorrow and gone Many a dandelion bouquet Handed to me over the years A pure expression of a child's love Laid down to wither Not fully appreciated Put aside thinking there will always be more Wanting to cherish these moments For tomorrow is flying by Let me hold this flower of motherhood And soak up the love it contains For the days of dandelions in grubby hands Are fading as the sun begins to set

Our Avarie Faith soft springy spiral curls sparkly dark chocolate eyes infectious smile skin a soft brown Our Avarie Faith bright questioning mind flare for the dramatic feels deeply longing for love and acceptance Our Avarie Faith music speaking to her soul body set in motion rhythm pours out emotions released Our Avarie Faith eyes searching noticing the differences wondering where she fits why she feels different Our Avarie Faith asking the hard questions "Why were there slaves?" "Why do they like him better then me?" "Why did he think that joke about black people is funny?" Our Avarie Faith hearing seeing feeling life as it is in her world As a white mother of a beautiful African American bi-racial child, my eyes are seeing things through her eyes now.  Things I never saw before or felt, I see and feel now.  I used to say prejudice and discrimination no longer existed.  That is n...

Thinking back as I sit in my quiet spot with my cup of coffee warming my hands....realizing how I have sometimes offered up prayers not understanding the full meaning of the words I spoke. "Lord, I want a life in which I can't live or breathe without you." Bold words.  I said them with noble intent.  I truly wanted every breath that I took to be with Jesus by my side. However, when I am honest I have to admit I wanted Him to be by my side as I lived my chosen life the way I desired.  I wanted to see the way where I was going.  I wanted a storybook life where everything turned out right. As my world spun out of control last year, I came face to face with the reality of the words I had spoken.  There were days I literally could not take the next breath without him.  The life I was so sure God had chosen for us seemed bleak and desperate.  I could not understand. All looked dark.  "Lord, how do I live when I can't see where I am going?" ...

It was a year ago our world was turned upside down.  Life as we knew it would never be the same.  I picked up my prayer journal today and read from January 20, 2015. "My heart is broken.  It feels like a knife is plunged into it and then it just keeps turning and cutting, slowly draining the life out.  Lord, I need your healing.  Hold me in your arms.  Wipe away my tears.  You are the Great Healer.  You can fix things that are beyond broken..." That was the beginning of last year.  I had no idea the pain that would follow.  The tears would keep coming. When I thought there could be no greater heartache, there was more.  One event followed another. We lived in the reality of "hurting people hurt people." I did not understand the ramifications of that prayer for healing, or the pain that it would put our family through.   In retrospect I understand now that only He knew what could bring about true healing.  What I tho...

  I awoke with an old hymn in my heart this morning.  This photo reminded me of the words, "...though sorrows like sea billows roll.  Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, it is well.  It is well with my soul."  And I am thankful...thankful that all is well despite the storm! Photo from www.freedigitalphotos.net It is hard to even begin to describe this year for our family.  Back in January, we began dealing with a rebellion with one of our sons that was difficult to understand.  There were sleepless nights.  There were days he didn't come home.  Many were the tears.  The concern and anguish ran deep.  We prayed and sought God as never before.  We turned to others for outside help, seeking counseling and prayers. It felt like things could not get worse, but it did in March.  Another son ended up in legal trouble.  We faced the difficult decision of turning him over to the authorities to be placed ...

I have always used canned spaghetti sauce as pizza sauce for my homemade pizza.  However, it often has unnecessary additives in it unless I want to fork out more dollars.  I like to save as much as possible on groceries, so I looked for a recipe for pizza sauce that would be inexpensive to make.  I found this one that is yummy, and I only modified it slightly.  The original recipe was  Kittencal's Pizza Sauce . Pizza Sauce 3-4 Tablespoons olive oil 1 medium onion, finely chopped 3 garlic cloves, minced 1 Tablespoon dried Italian seasoning 2 teaspoons oregano 1/4 c. tomato paste 1 (28 oz) can crushed tomatoes 1/2 to 1 teaspoon salt (I thought 1 teaspoon was too much, but my husband liked it) 1 Tablespoon of sugar In a saucepan, heat the olive oil; saute the onions, Italian seasoning, and oregano for 2-3 minutes. Add in garlic and saute for another 2 minutes. Add in the remaining ingredients; cook and simmer on low heat for 30-45 minutes. stirrin...