A Forgiving Heart (study guide)

"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."  Ephesians 4:32

One of the first verses I memorized as a child was Ephesians 4:32.  I remember my dad telling me how he often had to quote the same verse when he fought with his brother.  Following the family tradition, my children all knew this verse as the "B verse" in our alphabet memory verses.  A fight would break out, and I was ask them to quote the "B verse."  When the fighting didn't stop, they earned the privilege of writing it on paper ten times.

One particular child wrote Ephesians 4:32 so many times that at the age of 6, he proudly proclaimed to his grandparents that he could spell the word "compassionate."  Yes.  Yes, he could.  He had much practice.  Being kind was hard for this child, but I often found it much harder as a parent to teach the second portion of this verse. We had many a "face off."  Two angry children.  Arms crossed.  Glaring at each other.  One finally apologizes.  Then I'd ask the other to tell them, "I forgive you."  They would try to walk off.  They would look at the floor and mumble.  They would say, "It's fine" or "It's ok."  I always insisted on the words "I forgive you."  Finally, the words would be choked out.

Why is it we tend to choke up on the words "I forgive you?"  As you go through this study guide on forgiveness, keep that question in mind.
 

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Who do I forgive?

Mark 11:25 -

 Luke 11:4 -

 Luke 17:3-4 -

How do I forgive?

Col. 3:13 -

So then the question becomes, "How did Christ forgive?"

 Luke 23:32-34 -

When do I forgive?

Mt. 18:21-22 -

 Lk. 17:3-4 -

These verses have been used to say that we only have to forgive the person who asks for forgiveness. Do you agree or disagree?

I Pet. 4:7-8 -

Why do I forgive?

Mt. 6:9-15 -

Mt. 18:23-35 -

Forgiveness is a choice, but it is also an attitude of the heart. 

Read Psalm 103.

This chapter names numerous things God does for us. List some of them.


There are times it is difficult to forgive. Sometimes it seems virtually impossible. When faced with those times, mankind must remember what the Lord has done for him. Then forgiveness can be offered as an overflow of the heart and not as a duty that must be performed.

Why is it hard to say "I forgive you."  For me I get focused on the wrong inflicted on me.  I have a sense of justice that says they don't deserve to be forgiven.  There is truth to that.  Many times they don't deserve it.  They are flat out dirty rotten sinners.  BUT I have to remember who I am.  I, too, am a dirty rotten sinner.  I am undeserving of forgiveness as well.  It is hard to say "I forgive you" because we focus only on the wrong and the person who committed the wrong.  We have to put our focus on the "just as in Christ God forgave you."  With that focus...the hard becomes a bit easier.  In fact forgiveness becomes a natural overflow of gratefulness to God for what he has done for me.

To Exercise My Heart this Week:
1.  List the ways Jesus was wronged while he was on this earth.
2.   List the ways I have wronged Jesus.
3.  Write down what Jesus did for me.
4.  He has removed my sins as far as the east is from the west, so now how many sins do I have left to list here?

With a heart overflowing with gratefulness for what Christ did for me and for this world, I will forgive others.

Spend some time praying about any unforgiven offenses that I may be harboring in my heart. Decide whether to deal with them or let them go.