Mother of Seven + 2

Today I was being begged once again to allow a couple of my boys to be able to trade some of their toys with each other.  This is something that we put a stop to about four years ago.  I know it seems silly, but I got so tired of the arguments over who a particular toy belonged to.  The guideline we established was that when a child grew tired of a toy they could put it on the "everybody" toy shelf, but there was to be no trading or giving away.  This way any child could enjoy the toy that was no longer wanted by its owner. There were multiple reasons we developed this.  One was that one of our boys is a smooth quick talker.  He'd be a great salesman!  He has a way of talking other siblings out of their toys and trading a much inferior toy of his for it. The guideline was protection for his siblings. Another reason was for the simple fact that the children would change their minds after the trade was made.  Then the big argument or fight would...

It seems that as my children are getting older that a large part of my responsibility as a parent is to create motivation in them.  They need motivated to do their chores, use good table manners, have good hygiene, etc.  Some would say these are achieved through discipline and that is true to a degree.  I find the word discipline has a negative connotation though.  I've found that if I can light a fire under my children and give them a motivation to work on something, it gets accomplished much more quickly.  Let me explain by sharing some examples. I have one son who continually leaves his dresser drawers hanging open.  It's not necessarily a big deal, but it bothers me.  I tried to explain to him reasons like, "It looks untidy and the corners of the drawers would hurt someone if they ran into them," but to no avail.  A ten year old boy doesn't think these things matter much.  Having no desire to make a big deal out of it, but wanting a cha...

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.   Psalm 107:11 As 2011 begins my heart is full of gratefulness to the Lord for all he has done.  This was the fifth Christmas since we adopted.  The holidays have been especially rough for Troy and Mikey.  Between Thanksgiving and the middle of January each year had become an established pattern of emotional turmoil.  We would think things were going pretty well, then suddenly we would plunge into a wild roller coaster ride of behavior issues.  I love the holidays, but for this reason there was some wariness in my heart as they approached. However, God showed us his power to heal hurting hearts, and we had such a special Christmas.  This year we watched our boys eagerly beg us to open their presents to us first.  We saw them joyfully interacting with all their siblings and genuinely being happy.  They poured out love to those around them, and there was not a single angry o...